Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
