You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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