East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
you never un-have a 4some
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize