i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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