bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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