high people should be assigned attendants
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
