Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
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