At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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