he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
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All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
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Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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