Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got her a Nickelback box set.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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