omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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