wake up i wanna do it froggy style
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
