hell yes lets make some ravioli
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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