wat bout pragnant strippers??
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
