Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
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