you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Randomize
