my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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