I must be too annoying 4 u.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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