they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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