At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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