Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
How's your threesome situation going?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?