So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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