i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
