Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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