Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize