I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'm at about main and main street
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
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