Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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