Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south

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  (540): just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south http://tfl.nu/fqw1
  Replies (48) Good night (2726) Bad night (1774)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.

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  (850): i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate. http://tfl.nu/wnho
  Replies (90) Good night (690) Bad night (3579)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i live my life in a constant state of hangover.

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  (814): i live my life in a constant state of hangover. http://tfl.nu/0mdg
  Replies (25) Good night (3717) Bad night (1548)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him

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  (541): he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him http://tfl.nu/38fg
  Replies (6) Good night (4257) Bad night (1046)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.

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  (860): My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you. http://tfl.nu/g8rz
  Replies (4) Good night (3808) Bad night (1114)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.

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  (440): Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet. http://tfl.nu/2c2c
  Replies (10) Good night (3454) Bad night (1026)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.

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  (+44): I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating. http://tfl.nu/brik
  Replies (8) Good night (1134) Bad night (2574)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.

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  (484): all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar. http://tfl.nu/zjrs
  Replies (1) Good night (1507) Bad night (702)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked

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  (703): I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked http://tfl.nu/pe02
  Replies (4) Good night (929) Bad night (729)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Is there a law against that?

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.

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  (304): Is there a law against that? (717): Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life. http://tfl.nu/tyhd
  Replies (5) Good night (3431) Bad night (705)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.

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  (206): You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick. http://tfl.nu/hzir
  Replies (12) Good night (2495) Bad night (868)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.

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  (903): As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix. http://tfl.nu/azut
  Replies (5) Good night (1417) Bad night (646)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.

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  (609): Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend. http://tfl.nu/bphq
  Replies (5) Good night (1374) Bad night (545)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.

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  (732): She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked. http://tfl.nu/ufw5
  Replies (3) Good night (1300) Bad night (328)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.

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  (812): I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills. http://tfl.nu/whjf
  Replies (8) Good night (927) Bad night (304)

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