Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
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It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
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He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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