exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize
