he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
