omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
tonight lets celebrate not being married
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
