You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I just had sex on a roof
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
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