he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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