dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
