You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
