stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
