Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
