me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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