Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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