We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
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What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
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guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Drunk is a universal language darling
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