you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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