please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
do herpes really smell.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
