Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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