East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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