i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
