I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
