Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
everyone is single if you try hard enough
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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