sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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