Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
