I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
