he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize